FREE.

While sitting and waiting for a colleague who went to the bank to get some cash for me, this blog post drops in my heart.

Mind dialogue......

"Like Ruth you don't get it, this guy has to see me shine. He has to see that he made a very big mistake by choosing that girl who can't stand me over me. He MUST not only know that he missed, he must also SEE that he LOST. He is a big loser."

"Girl, are you saying that your motivation towards success is your ex who is probably having a ball in his present relationship?"

"No, I am not saying that Ruth. Am just living my best life and little Jonny thinks his walkout meant am done."

Hmmmmm 

"So, why are you obsessed with him Knowing and Seeing your successful progressions."

"Ruth, he needs to see and he has to take it cause am gonna give him hot hot!"

#Laughs 

"Well, that to me sounds like you are in bondage, he is still in control of your emotions even though he walked out of your love like yesterday!"

"Girl, imagine your ex who treated you so low being the motivating wheel of your success drive?" 

"Yes, it's cool to do better after knowing better, but it's best if the source or drive of your better is BooJesus not little Jonny."

"Ruth are you saying you are perfect and have not been motivated by the pull to SHOW your ex. Girl, biko be realistic..."

"Well..... I have. Like he needs to see am smiling without him, catching trips, going for shows and functions. Looking sexy than the fat bitch he picked over me. Starting my business, growing my network, touring the world without giving a dam!"

"Now you are talking Ruth..."

"Shhhhh let me finish. He needs to see that I have a new consistent Bobo who is not a pitiful liar plus he needs to see that he is the one who LOST."

"Great!"

"But girl, he never saw that.....All he saw was the control he had over me no matter how big I got. He had a satisfying smile that screamed I still got her!"

"Babe, the most self destructive part was, I never enjoyed my blessings. The push to SHOW him exhausted me!"

"Really?"

"Yes girl. Guess what"

"What?"

Healed and Freeeeeeeeee

"In his mercy, Boo Jesus stilled everything so that I could see how glorious I was when I didn't care who saw me, when I didn't care who got it hot hot, when I didn't care who watched my show cos His Angles watched me blossom in glory and cheered me on!"

"Wow!

"Yes girl"

'Boo Jesus said' "I HAVE TO HEAL YOU".

I was afraid to heal cos I felt it would destroy my drive to succeed. He was quiet as he read my thought and went to work without me knowing. 

"So, how do you know you are healed Ruth?"

"I didn't until I was offered a portion that would translate my glory to a glory that would be the master of little Jonny's glory from man's perspective." 

At the offer, I paused and said to me, "that is not the portion I want." 

The elevation that comes with this glory is gonna destroy his glory but even more my peace and freedom. 

That familiar pull stretch it's false claws but had lost it's strength that all I could see motivating my decision was me, myself and I. 

I didn't know I had such strong positive pull!

I choose NO to the alluring but void portion and still had my smile in my dress of contentment sipping from my juice of Joy!

LOL

"So Girl, go ahead and be FREE!"

"So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free"  - John 8vs36

I Love You!

Hugs&High5💝💝💝💝💝

Your Single Buddy💕